14. What advice would you give to those trying to overcome BDD?

The first step to learning to live with the illness is accepting that it is an illness!, a chemical imbalance in the mind that makes us see a distorted image of ourself.
Understanding that we have an unrealistic expectation of perfection, a perfection that can not exist, remember beauty is in the eye of the beholder, we all have a different idea of what is attractive, but its who we are that makes us special!.
My brother once told me “It is easy to get bored of what you have when you see the same thing in the mirror every day, but remember to everyone else you are unique”.

I know it is easier said than done, but only they can make that first step, writing a list of goals is also a good way of learning how to face your fears, it is not always going to be easy, and like with any illness there will always be set backs, but eventually you can finally feel that sense of achievement as your body adjusts to the changes you have made within your life, and learning to take control of the BDD.

No amount of surgery can cure a BDD suffer, you need to build on who you are from the inside so that you can finally learn to accept who you are on the outside, what you are seeing is an illusion, but even if it wasn’t why should it stop you from living your life, after all anyone who would judge you would not be worth the opinion of, listen to the people who love you, and cherish what you have.

There are people out there who have many disfigurements, for example I saw a girl on TV the other day who had suffered 60% burns to her face, and you know what I still thought she was so beautiful, her energy and strength some through, she was so determined to live her life.
By holding your head up high and showing confidence you will make others see you as a better person, it does not matter what you look like if you feel good about yourself then others will see that!.

I used my lights camera action mantra, I pretended to be someone else when I left the house, eventually I did become that person, if you think of someone you aspire to and believe in your head that you are them, it can help give you the confidence to build on who you are inside.

When leaving the house don’t allow yourself to focus, I use a small mirror to get ready and when doing my hair I keep my thoughts focused on what I am doing that day, i.e. cleaning the bathroom etc, anything to keep your mind occupied.

Sometimes I do still wake up and have bad days, the days where the BDD is trying to control me, where all I want to do is turn the lights off and stay in my bed!, but I force myself to get up and face the day, once you have something to work on it helps divert your thoughts away from thinking of your appearance, i.e. painting, dancing any hobby or project that will occupy your mind.

We are all different and there is no right or wrong way to achieve your goals, but as long as you do achieve them and you take control of the BDD then you are ultimately regaining control over your life, remember this is all in the mind, and by diverting your attention away from the BDD you are controlling it.

There are also some fantastic forums, and sometimes sharing your experiences with others can help you to feel less alone, one website that you may find useful is BDD Central http://www.bddcentral.com/
Here you can share your experiences with other suffers which often helps to make you feel less alone.

Life is a gift, and why should it be wasted because of what we see in the mirror, we may not be able to control what we look like! but we can control who we are! And our life is in our own hands.